The floods around our state are devastating. We haven’t been quite as effected by the impact. However, seeing images of places we love in our gorgeous state completely underwater is sad and scary. We feel blessed, but are praying for those who will hopefully be able to finally begin recovering in the next couple of days. For now, the rain has stopped but it seems likely to come again.
In the midst of the chaotic weather, I have been stealing away moments all week to read Bringing up Bebe that I had checked out from my library. As parent’s Xerxes and I entered the job with a vague amount of past experience (I lived with my sister, her husband and four little ones for awhile) and the culture that we were raised in. Somewhere in the middle of my first pregnancy, one of us threw a parenting book across the room and we were both wary to grab another. So, in the first three years of being parents we have been sort of winging it.
For the most part, this seems to work. While I hold my infant and write this I realize I am super comfortable with the baby stage. When in doubt about what to do, I usually nurse him. It is when they get older that I feel a bit more confused. When the book started talking about the slightly older child I was all ears.
The basic gist from the book is that children need boundaries and a whole lot of freedom within that. In many ways, you could argue Americans want a lot of freedom too. There seems an obsession with things such as self-soothing and sleeping through the night, but it seems our idea of freedom is often at the expense of boundaries. Then we manage to over-parent in strange ways that actually hinder creativity and freedom, elements that I feel are essential to the growing process. Reading the book, or her shorter al a carte version that I just found, will give you the actual incite as relates to your own life and I highly recommend checking it out.
For me, especially this week I have been relaxing a lot about how I parent. Mostly, I have realized I am not the type to get down and play with Juliette on a regular basis. But, I am aware that is the norm in our society. This often leaves me feeling guilty and frustrated since I am unable to ‘get anything done’ because I am battling with the ‘fun’ obligations to her. I’d love to go to a park, have her play and just read a book without feeling guilty, but that isn’t what we are expected to do as parent’s. Honestly, I usually let her run off and I will occasionally swing her or if she requests go down the slide with her. But, I want her to experience, feel and love the world without me. Standing by and catching glimpses of her joy is my prize.
Reading the book made me realize my natural desire to let her play solo is actually a good thing. This is where she is gaining independence. This is how she learns and becomes creative. My interruptions are not helpful. Granted, there are days I will build a sandcastle with her at the beach, run alongside her bike and put her up on my legs to play airplane, but this is no longer a daily demand.
There are other elements that I became more aware of, too. For example, our ‘good little eater’ probably comes from our semi-French approach of just expecting her to try everything at the dinner table, not forcing her to finish anything and more importantly not downplaying her taste buds by only serving ‘kid-foods’. We also don’t snack much in general and for example today she didn’t finish her lunch, but declared she was hungry after school. We opened her lunch bag and she dove in and finished most of it.
She seems to have become aware that everything from goldfish crackers to pirate booty are super special treats that she can enjoy at friend’s homes. We don’t offer them here, but they are not really missed either. We do have popcorn, which she loves helping whip up a batch and we usually enjoy it while watching a movie as a family.
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Speaking of food, Juliette and I started the day with a breakfast of yogurt, peaches, and a light sprinkle of granola. Despite our sugar fast, the book has made me realize that for her complete absence from sugar will only make it more crave-worthy, so I am trying to lighten how I approach it with her. The rest of us in the family know this is temporary and should be able to fully handle living without. Although, I did notice a bit of ketchup being used with fries and the burger that was eaten last night, but I didn’t do too much finger wagging. We all have our indiscretions and I am feeling guilty enough about my small mistakes throughout this sugar process to point too many fingers.
For lunch, I made sandwiches for Juliette and I to enjoy separately: Cucumber & Hummus Sandwiches and Homemade Ricotta & Peach Sandwiches. Hers went into her lunch bag, mine tucked in my purse/diaper bag. I loved mine up on the bed while rocking Zed back to sleep, after a morning at a cafe. Juliette brought home her lunch bag that appeared only slightly touched. The six little raisins in her coconut flake greek yogurt had been enjoyed and a bite or two out of each little sandwich. The Carrot & Celery Stick Stack had decreased in size, but not by much. Of course, as I mentioned above, she devoured it as soon as we were home.
Barely a couple hours after we got home from school, Xerxes texted to say he was done with work. They let everyone go home early since road closures continue to increase by the hour as every new storm arrives. Knowing the roads between him and us were relatively fine, we headed to Golden, swooped him up and went to the Mountain Toad Brewery. A barbeque Food Truck was also there and the large picnic table umbrellas meant that any impending rain would not ruin our fun. Which we certainly had! There were games for Juliette to play and the Homemade Potato Chips, Smoked Pork, Slaw and Potato Salad were a great compliment to our micro-brews. A few of Xerxes’ co-workers and wives arrived as well.
Just as our fun was about to finish, Lulu arrived. As the sun set we were blessed with a gorgeous double rainbow and a generous sprinkle of rain that really only required rain jackets and umbrellas dangling closed from our swinging hands.
At this point, we walked along Clear Creek which was rushing madder than we had ever seen in all of our time living in Golden. We continued our walk and ended up at Table Mountain Inn for a bit more food: Guacamole & Chips and Xerxes and his Mom shared a Burger. Much to my chagrin, we ordered the Mac n Cheese with Fruit for Juliette, but the swirling noodles were actually prepared with sauce & cheese not powdered mix and this made me feel a bit better after my subconscious declaration to not buy from the kid’s menu. It was a huge portion, so I dined on some of it myself. 😉
Cheers and for anyone in Colorado- I pray you stay dry and out of the deep mud and scary floods,
Lilly